Lasting moments of pregnancy...

I know I talk often on my pregnancy...I have waited so long for it. We have certainly struggled for it and with it. And as I sit 25 days from my scheduled c-section...I have had time to reflect. I do love being pregnant...feeling those kicks still gives me chills. It is so miraculous. The whole process is magical and divine in their purest sense. As my last weeks go by...I do realize my energy has decreased. I find myself more and more impatient with circumstances and people and quirks. And I try to not...but those hormones can't help themselves. And I find myself more vulnerable..more sensitive and more aware of my many imperfections and more needy of reassurance. So I take a step back today and I just want to be grateful for this little being soon to come to our family. Christian was talking about him this morning saying he could hardly wait but then said "well, if he survives, right?" ...to which I was immediately taken back. I think he said it in fun not really meaning what he said. And then the twinge of paranoia came back in my heart. My appointment with the fetal specialist tomorrow should share a lot about the health of our little man. And my thoughts race back to "if he survives". There has been NO indication he would not...but then we all know the fragile nature of those littles...you just never know. So today I turn my fears into faith that He loves this little guy as much/more than we do...and is helping him finish cooking in my ever-growing belly. Things will be great...we will see this cute little man...sooner than I realize...and then I will be wishing I had relished a little longer in those kicks inside.